Monday, June 30, 2014

Away


    This pretty much sums up how I've been feeling recently. Well, more so how I felt some days ago, and a little bit now, but now it's more so I'm wanting to just curl up and sleep. I'm tired, but I can never sleep when I should, which is just awful, and then I want to sleep for a variety of reasons; one being I'm currently waiting for the proverbial shoe to drop since Friday. Will see how that goes whenever my phone decides to buzz, could just be my eternal pessimism, but I'm not sure. 
    The wanting to just up and go is something completely different. It's not born from a want to leave those I care about, but just a want to...go. Wanderlust, perhaps. I may be going to another state in August, and that makes me all sorts of nervous, but what doesn't make me nervous is the thought, hope,that  I'll end up in Europe (Germany if life decides to be nice to me) some day. I do things by feeling, rarely do I apply logical thought to anything until after the fact, and going over there is one of those things that just calls me. As it is, if I won the lottery or some way else was able to just up and go to anywhere in Europe, I'd take it. I would go and figure it out from there no matter which point of my life I'm at. I don't like risks, I loathe them with a fiery passion, but when I've a good feeling about something...I do it. I go for it and I hope that I'm right. It may seem rather nonsensical, but that's simply how I operate. 
    As I said, this is still a feeling inside of me, a bit overtaken by my current state, but it's still there. It was worse a bit ago where I was dreaming up various fantasies involving my great-great (think it's two greats) aunt from Germany, some second or third cousins that I know exist but have yet to meet because they live across the Atlantic, and other things. I don't care when in my life I'll do it, but as soon as I've the opportunity, I know I'll go for it. I'll go off to wherever and see what I can do with that. Set down new roots and such. Before I actually obtain my degree, after, when I'm a hundred years old, I honestly don't care so long as I do manage this. There are few things I desperately want in life, and this is certainly one of them. Why? I'll find out when I get there.

11 comments:

  1. :-) Germany is sooo big - I have to admit a lot smaller than any state in America but it is big still in the kind that it looks a lot different and feels different in the different parts of it. ;-) Any idea if you want to have high mountains or middle mountains or small mountains or coast - coast with no water half of the day and coast with everytime water - forest or meadow or a lot of lakes? What we haven't is ... uhm... desert, I think. And no southlandish jungle. *smiles and winks* And I won't begin to ask you how you would like the people around you... :-D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It can't be smaller than little Rhode Island, nothing is smaller than that one :P
      But, yea, can't say I know anywhere exactly in Germany I'd want to live when I get over there. I like small towns and beaches and stuff, but it depends, likely will look up a list of cities/towns/etc. and pick one by which name sounds good :P
      Like I've said up there, my choices are...random and by intuition only most often :) I'll worry about the people when I get there, too ;)

      Delete
    2. since you apparently like me you might like the kind of people I´d prefer around me, too, so I´d recommend the northern part of germany for the people question :P and for the coast with or without water as well, but there are nice regions with forests and mountains if you like hiking elsewhere, the north is very lacking in mountains, generally the routes along the bigger rivers are very nice too, many medieval castles and stuff. Best recommendation of course is to win the lottery and see all of europe incl. all of germany ;)

      Delete
  2. :-D I'll will help you with names then. ;-)
    And that is not true, that nothing can't be smaller than Rhode Island: 4 of the states of Germany are smaller, ok, three of them are town-states, but one land still is smaller than Rhode Island: the Saarland: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saarland And the people there are very proud of it. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Knew there was a reason for keeping ya around ;)
      And ooh, hm, I see. Well, learn something new every day lol Thanks, and they should be *nods*

      Delete
  3. to that I say only one thing - about every german I know, would go to the us, to australia, to mallorca, to wherever if they won the lottery or could just up and go, even forever, to wherever, only not stay in germany :P I know some places I´d prefer too, and hope I´ll end up in one of them some day, not that there aren´t nice places here or that germany doesn´t have many advantage, but it is like it is, many people stay in a land because they know the language and ways, have a job there, have friends they´d miss, have children going to school, parents they feel obliged to take care of etc. and probably it´s good as it is, but many would be elsewhere if those things were different.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know, I should be sleeping and not replying, but since i can't sleep anyway :P
      Yea...I think after being in a place for a time, it's more or less normal to want to go someplace else maybe. I mean, while I'm planning to go to Germany, not sure if I'll live and die there, depends on how life goes, of course. I Just have a good feeling that good things will happen if go there as weird as that is *shrugs*
      Though the people who would hop to the US...I guess i can see the allure but...eh...I want out, that's all I can say. Even with, like you say for Germany, America's got some nice palces and such, but...is like it is here, too. Any chance I could trade places with anyone who wants to be in the US rather? :P

      Delete
    2. not with me, the us is not on my list of places I want to die at :P

      Delete
  4. ok, two things. nice pic with the suitcase and wanderlust in it, though I really hate suitcases rl, I never take suitcases. but as symbol they work ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You don't like suitcases? I like them plenty enough since...can put stuff in them :P But I've also never flown and had to pay for baggage so that could add to that a bit lol
      But glad you like the pic and symbol of it at least :)

      Delete
  5. no, I hate them, I make a point of always only taking carry on luggage too so I don´t need to wait at the conveyor belts for my stuff, and I like to be able to carry my luggage around halfways comfortably, that´s very useful if you go somewhere without having a hotel or place booked beforehand. last summer my son wanted to take his bodyboard of course but I told him to leave it at home, there are cheap ones to buy, so we bought two there and when we had to leave, gave them away to two boys on our last day on the beach, who were very happy with them. If I need more than fits into some bigger sports bag, I take a backpack if traveling by car or train, but for plane I try to avoid to take much. Just what I really need and no 'just in case' stuff, I rather take the risk of maybe having to buy a thick jacket if it would suddenly be cold like winter in portugal in july or having to by some cheap towel or underwear or t-shirt if all washing machines on a camping-site decide to be out of order when I come, and I never was at a place where I couldn´t buy a bottle of shower gel or toothpaste and so on. Different if you go somewhere for months of course, I had more luggage when I went to a place for 3 months, but how often does that happen (and was no suitcase still, just an additional big bag). Suitcases are too unwieldy for my taste. and don´t get me started about the kind people pull behind them making the most annoying sounds :P)

    ReplyDelete